Tea with Linda - Honor

Tea with Linda - Honor

Contributor: Linda Kavelin Popov, Co-Founder of TVP, August 2025

Honoring the Spirit is at the heart of the Five Virtues Strategies. It uplifts our wellbeing and that of everyone around us. It supports the dignity and value of every person, including ourselves.

Honoring the spirit of a child is to view them through the lens of virtues. “See me beautiful,”

sings Red Grammar, “Look for the best in me. It’s who I really am and all I want to be.” It’s far

more effective to call a child to a virtue and then acknowledge it when they show it than to call them shaming names, creating hopeless guilt that denies their capacity and worth. 

Author Leo Buscaglio asked four-year-old Billy how he knew he was loved. "When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth." 

We need to call ourselves by our true names as well. Observe your self-talk and purify any negative shaming leftovers with virtues. Replace “I’m such an idiot,” with, “I need to really deepen my wisdom.” Criticism demeans the honor due to a son or daughter of the Creator. 

All Five Virtues Strategies call for an attitude of honor and confidence. It allows us to face our teachable moments as opportunities to cultivate virtues, and to set clear boundaries to protect our own wellbeing. Boundaries with clear consequences that are well understood make frustration meltdowns unnecessary in our families and workplaces. Companioning by simply asking questions that get to the heart of the matter is a deeply honoring practice and validates each other’s emotions.

I was briefly companioning a woman who was near burnout after serving years in social services. "I just can’t seem to make a change, and it’s killing me slowly,” she said. I acknowledged her for her years of dedication and then said, “I’ve noticed that when givers can’t find their balance or set boundaries, it’s almost always a worthiness issue.” She shed a few tears before we parted. Soon, she took time off and then found a new, less stressful job.

Honor calls us to stand straighter, to walk our talk, to strive for impeccable integrity in a world where honor is undermined by narcissistic self-interest and material gain. The love of power seems to overwhelm the power of love these days. My hope is brightened by the awareness that the human spirit is connected at the soul level. So, ANY choice to honor one’s better nature, to keep our word, to be constant in our trustworthiness infuses light across our small planet. ” 

I asked a friend this morning, “What do you think of when you hear the virtue of honor?” He replied, “I can’t think right now.” I waited and smiled at him. Then, he said wisely, “Someone who is honorable is someone you look at and know that’s a good person. They put others before themselves.” When we practice honor, life is more just and joyful.