Tea with Linda - MINDFULNESS
Tea with Linda - MINDFULNESS
Linda Kavelin Popov, Co-Founder of TVP, August 2023
What a difference between feeling stressed “out of our minds” and being fully present in the moment. Mindfulness is deep engagement balanced with detachment and the acute awareness of our own agency. We cannot control what happens, but we have the freedom to respond consciously and ably to whatever happens. Author Stephen Covey, quoting psychiatrist, author, and concentration camp survivor Viktor E Frankl, wrote “Between the stimulus and the response, there is always choice.” Whatever emotions arise, mindfulness helps us to feel them, step back and observe them, then consciously choose our response. I once discovered in a very real and practical way how powerful it is to apply mindfulness when threatened by another’s irrational use of power. I was called to meet with the executive director of an organization after meeting with the board of directors the week before. I presented a proposal, and the board unanimously accepted it. As I took a seat in his office, the ED casually informed me that he had decided to override and reverse the decision. I felt blind-sided by anger for a moment and tears threatened. Oh no, I was not going to cry in front of this man. I excused myself to retreat to the women’s room to pray. Suddenly, a thought appeared -- a Buddhist teaching about what to do with anger. Bring it deep inside, picture it as a sword, wrap the light of
truth around it and bring it forth shining with justice and clarity. This thought calmed me deeply. I went back into the room, and spoke firmly to this man who had power over me, describing one by one, the consequences should he reverse the decision the board had made. His face turned beet red, and he replied gruffly, “Fine! Have it your way.” In that teachable moment, I marveled at the power of mindfulness to transform the energy of anger into a virtue.
Here are three ways to cultivate mindfulness:
First, create a daily routine of reverence - a practice of reflection, prayer, and meditation. There are many ways to meditate, such as reflecting on gratitude, chanting a mantra, breath meditations, or opening yourself to Divine guidance and listening for a response to prayer. You can visualize yourself communing with wise ones from the spiritual realm – your “A-Team” of angels, ancestors, and advisors. Keep a journal in which to write down your thoughts, dreams, and lessons.
Second, bring yourself to account each day, with fearless honesty and compassion, noting your progress as well as ways to work on your growth virtues.
Third, be in your body. Be aware of your breathing. Feel your muscles when you walk. Notice what you see, smell, hear, and taste. Be present. When you’re washing the dishes, wash the dishes. Reduce the time you spend on electronics. Spend time in the beauty and stillness of nature. Focus on being more than doing. Refuse to rush. Mindfully reset the way you use your time and energy to a pace of grace that allows you to feel at home in your life and to make self-care a priority. Buddhist Monk Thich Nhat Han says, “In mindfulness one is not only restful and happy, but alert and awake. Meditation is not evasion; it is a serene encounter with reality.” As Baba Ram Dass said, “Be here now.”